Author : Mary Ann Copson
"Before you know what kindness really is you must lose
things, feel the future dissolve in a moment like salt in a
weakened broth. What you counted and carefully saved, all
this must go so you know how desolate the landscape can
be between the regions of kindness."
- Naomi Shihab NyeOne of the major characteristics I see with women –
especially mothers – is the generosity and kindness given
to every one else but themselves. It is standard for them to
pack everyone else's lunch and then skip their own. They
will forgive their children anything but relentlessly and
unforgivingly criticize every little mistake and lack of
judgement of their own. They will go without sleep so they
can support a friend. And abandon their dreams in favor of
making sure their significant other or children get what they
want.The main difficulty with this approach is that it is a huge
energy gobbler. If you fixate on your bad choices and
mistakes and fail to make the time to give yourself attention
and kindness, you give your energy to tension, stress, and
dissatisfaction.Every time we fail to give loving kindness to ourselves in the
same measure that we give to others - or more - the
emotions of guilt, anger, doubt, and fear become like black
holes sucking up our energy for life. This can leave you
empty and spent.By learning to be kind to ourselves first, we enter the
experience of the greatness of who we are. Because we are
intimately connected to everyone else, when we truly
experience the greatness of ourselves we can not help but
respect, honor and be naturally loving and kind to all others.
When we are kind to ourselves, we allow our selves and our
life to reconnect to its natural purpose – happiness. And
happiness pulls you forward.Ways to be kind to yourself:
*Write down the kind and compassionate things you did
today and hold yourself in reverence for those acts of
kindness and compassion.*When you do something kind for another do something
kind for yourself.*Pledge time to your own self care – and really take that time
for yourself.*Before you go to bed truly forgive yourself for any mistake,
upset or error you made the day. Keep the learning and
release the mistake.*Develop and practice loving kindness meditation for
yourself. The simplest example of this is to spend some
time each day bringing your attention, focus and
concentration to those things you wish for yourself. Not in a
desperate attempt to make them happen, but in a kind,
loving embrace of your needs and wants. As you nurture your loving kindness to yourself, you will fan
the flames of kindness and compassion which will flourish
and grow – creating an upward, energy giving spiral of
positive emotions."Too often we under estimate the power of a touch, a smile,
a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the
smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn
a life around."
-Leo BuscagliaHave you been kind to yourself today?If you are tired, have you rested?If you have made a mistake, have you forgiven yourself?Have you wished yourself well today- unconditionally?Have you congratulated yourself for just showing up?Have you done something special for yourself today?If you did not answer yes to every question take a leap and
begin developing kindness toward yourself. It might be
scary at first but will prove to be worth the journey.Mary Ann Copson is the creator of the Evenstar
Mood and Energy Management System for Women.
With Master's Degrees in Human Development and in
Psychology and Counseling, Mary Ann is a Certified
Licensed Nutritionist, a Certified Holistic Health
Practitioner, a Brain Chemistry Profile Clinician, a
Professional Life Coach and Human Development
Consultant. For resources about reconnecting to your
natural rhythms through better management of your
physical, emotional, mental, psychological and spiritual
energy visit http://evenstaronline.com.
Keyword : dissatisfaction, tension, stress, unhappiness, happiness, compassion for yourself
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